Mood-Boosting Habits
It’s a tough day, moment, and or situation, and you have had enough? What’s the “thing” that does it for you? You know, it relaxes you and calms you. The “thing or things” that soothes you. Our brain is like other muscles and requires training. Our bodies, without training, take it course based on genetics, what we eat, etc. Our mind takes its approach based on past experiences, what we allow etc. How we react to these tough days forms the habits that our mind goes to for future coping. It provides the tools for our memory banks for these situations. Our thoughts create our actions, and our actions become our habits. Some cases or people can wipe us out. So, what do you have in your toolbox for when your sad, angry, tired, disappointed……?
Here are some tips for mood-boosting habits.
- What calms and soothes you?
Warm coffee/tea, sauna’s, Prayer, music, working out are some of the things that do it for me. What are the things that make you feel calm, peaceful despite any situation?
2. What makes you smile and happy? What is the thing that makes you squeal and scream in the excitement that you get to do?
I like getaways and massages and cauliflower pizza, coffee, and thrifting. What are the things that make you feel fulfilled and happy despite any situation?
3. What takes your mind off the toughest days and silences the thoughts?
Writing, Basketball, Reading, A nice car ride and music, and worship do it for me.
The key is creating the habit of CHOOSING the thing you like to defend unwanted thoughts, unwanted feelings, etc. The situations don’t go away with coping, but it sure helps you calm enough and be at peace enough to make healthy decisions. CHOOSING to do what you love gets you through life’s challenges of toxic relationships, other’s opinions of you, being hard on yourself, and low self-esteem, among other things. I use the acronym P.S. M.E.P.S. to talk about holistic wellness; (Purposeful living, Spiritual Health, Mental Health, Emotional Health, Physical Health, Social Health).
If any of these areas are off, you are off! And you aren’t your best self! The answers to the following questions are actual and apparent every day in the lives of individuals.
How can I set boundaries for the toxic relationships in my life?
How can I love myself and reject other’s opinions about me?
How can I give myself permission for things for which I’m so hard on myself?
How can I boost my self-esteem and not depend so much on other’s opinions of me?
What habits can I choose that are healthy that don’t involve alcohol and or drugs?
How can I reach my goals?
How can I create time in my schedule to boost my mood?
Pursuing the answer to these questions begins with triumphing over our emotions, being clear and calm enough to make the healthiest, most appropriate decision. It is the prerequisite for an attempt to complete wellness in the areas above. How you cope is essential. It’s the difference between a cycle of toxicity or a circle of positivity. Sadly, sometimes we can get used to the toxic. And even view it as a norm and give in to it. However, this is not healthy. It’s okay to say No, to toxic things, relationships, etc. Improvement is the name of the game. With that said, the more that you do something that improves your mood in these situations, your brain will give me more of that! You must be careful. Now here is the warning label on the prescription bottle. The thing/things you choose must be a healthy substitute. Whatever you’re doing to calm/ soothe/ make you happy is likely to boost two things; your endorphins (which tell your body that you have the energy) and Dopamine (which signals your body is happy). So, things to watch out for are food/drugs/sex to do this. Yes, we can have an unhealthy relationship with food, and we can use it as comfort instead of fuel. We eat to live, not live to eat, lol. If you’re doing the former, you are using food as a weapon to your own body . Same with drugs, if you are making a habit of drinking, smoke, take pills, for comfort, and escape, you have an unhealthy relationship with substances. And seeking sex for comfort can lead you down a slippery slope, and it can be just temporary for a raise in Dopamine but a long-standing impact on your emotional and spiritual health if not in healthy circumstance. Addictions come in many forms, watch out for one’s besides the aforementioned.
Just as our brains can be accustomed to low serotonin levels and trauma it can be acclimated to us CHOOSING something that will improve our moods. There are natural things-habits that can raise our endorphins and Dopamine without the consequences . In therapy, I give my client’s ideas to get the wheels churning of things that can get them in a zone and out of their head. I’ll share some below!
Sports/ Fitness (joining an actual sport, playing leisurely, working out, etc.)
Laughter- (comedy shows, Tic-toc, funny movies)
Making money (gifts will make room for you)
Pursuing passions and interest
Going places you like (mall, restaurants, amusement parks, friends’ houses, etc.)
Games (D&D, Game consoles, board games, cards, etc.)
Getting outside (nature, camping, flying kites, taking walks, fishing, etc.)
Talking (to friends, family, therapist, group, etc.)
Arts and Crafts (Coloring, Writing, Drawing, Sowing, woodshop anything you like to create)
Dancing Freely (Could be a class or just in your home)
Physical touch (Hugs, cuddling)
Read (The bible, self-help books, anything positive)
Road trips/ car rides (Windows down and loud music is my thing, lol)
Connecting with your inner child (jumping on the bed, playing, etc. think of what you loved as a child)
These are just ideas and aren’t end all be all. The point is that making a habit of boosting our moods is very important to the quality of our lives. Consistency is Key! If you read this and feel like you are in a dump, nothing jogged for you or seemed possible to improve your mood, contact a mental health professional. During this pandemic, I saw some of the lowest serotonin levels in society in general. Post pandemic, we will need to pay close attention to loving ourselves and boosting our moods. I challenge you to write a list of things that calm/ soothe or make you happy. It can be things that are inexpensive and free. It does not have to cost money. Pass this blog along so others can get some encouragement that they aren’t alone and information that will help their holistic wellness!
Sharquita R. Dudley, MSW, LCSW